Posted in babies, books, encouragement, family, food, humor, kids, mommy, obedience, Parenting, parenting advice, Uncategorized

Getting your kids to listen

Anyone who has kids knows that kids are just small bonkers versions of adults. They have their own individual wants, needs, likes, etc. when most parents are searching online for help getting their kids to listen, its likely at a breaking point. maybe its been a long day of repeating, whining, nagging, tantrums, and more.

believe me i feel you, ive been there more times than i can count, endlessly searching the internet for some magic solution that will get all of my kids to listen. listen i know its irrational, and honestly you do too. There is not one way to get your kids to listen. we read these parenting advice books written often times by adults who have had little interaction with children and who present what to do in and IDEAL world. one where kids are always eager to listen, to be instructed. a world where kids instantly drop their own desires to follow your well guided instructions. but lets be real, any parent knows that it is more than that. that the endless sleepless nights result in low patience for both kids and parents. that the SAME gosh darn instructions repeated day in and day out grind on your nerves. that the food we make bc its cheap and easy isnt what they want to eat and no amount of bribing seems to help. youre doing the best you can but youre starting to question your ability to parent and raise these young people.

youve gotten to a point where you look at them and instead of seeing the bright beautiful shining face of your child, you see a tiny terror. and its time for a time out. now this isnt going to go into the pro/con of spanking, timeouts, speaking logically to them. this right here is for YOU. YOU need a time out, you need to take a step back first and foremost and forget the obligations you have. your sole obligation is to LOVE this little person. the dishes can wait, the laundry will still be there, dinner might be a little icky tonight. its all fine. give you and your kiddo a break. its not going to solve the bigger issues BUT well get to that. look up right now, look at your kiddo, the tiny tornado ripping thru your house and patience, and see the newborn you held in your arms, see the fresh face of them sleeping peacefully in your arms when you brought them home, remember the joy of their first word, think on that for a moment.

done? ok next put down the phone, tablet, computer and walk over to give them a hug, tell them you love them, look them in the eye and tell them how much you love being their mommy (daddy)

done? ok so now that were all back in reality and feeling the love, lets go over a few things.

first of all kids are KIDS, theyre irrational, theyre impulsive, their ability to understand consequences is still developing, they are learning all of the things you already know how to do. so many times we try to treat and parent kids as if theyre simply mini adults. theyre not. plain and simple. they are mini humans but they lack the abilities to perceive much beyond the now. think about the expectations you have for your kids, are they realistic?

kids are basically endless tubes of energy and it can be directed but not controlled. have you provided the proper environment and outlets for their energy? or have you just put them in a room with a bunch of toys? Do you look around and see a room full of toys? is it a giant mess you hate to clean up? have you seen your kids actually play with the toys or just move them around. if youre like we were, we had so many toys of all kids all over, they were never really cleaned up. and the kids were always getting into trouble for doing other things but we never really saw any PLAYING with the toys. kids are extremely creative, inquisitive, and short sighted. we took the painful (for me) step of taking away their toys, the hundreds of dollars spent boxed up and put away in a closet. we told our families NO toys for gifts (greatgrandma didnt listen but shes old so eh). sounds super cruel right? well i for one was tired of tripping on and stepping on these toys. I felt as though they had no respect for the items they had, for the people who had lovingly gotten them for them, or appreciate the blessings they have when so many other kids have so little. I began to feel as if my kids were spoiled and ungrateful. BUT you know what happened? we got some inexpensive totes from walmart, filled them with different things, ( lincoln logs, mini animals and maps for the lincoln logs, paydoh, magnents, dominoes, building block, and other educational toys, musical instruments) we labeled them and stacked them in the cabinet. i didnt take everything away i just took away their ability to easily dump everything. we limited the toys they did have into a few options. And the first few days were hard they wanted everything out, but we told them since they didnt take care of their toys we couldnt trust them with them. we put the ball in their court, both to learn respect, and building trust. with fewer options the mess was less AND they really appreciated the toys they did have and would spend hours with one box. i fully intended to go thru the other tubs and organize those but honestly they haven’t even asked about them so probably going to get rid of them. anyways these smaller amounts of toys were much easier for young kids to help clean up, there was not any overwhelming amount of different options, simply lincoln logs thats it so they all get put in the box. this has given them the ability to take responsibility for their things. this small thing gave me the confidence to take further steps on getting the kids to listen

is obedience the goal?

i realized that the goal isnt strict obedience, bc i want them to know how to see something needs done and do it. if i simply tell them to put away their toys they may do it but will they have learned to put them away when theyre done? obviously i want my kids to do what theyre told the first time who doesnt? but i also want them to have the initiate to do it without EVER being asked. i got a book on accident at the beginning of the year, i ordered something off amazon and they sent the wrong thing, i tried to return it but they said to keep it. well its called 1.2.3 Magic, i think there is a parenting version but this was a story to read WITH the kids. basically i realized with this book that i never actually explained to my kids what i was counting for. like you need to do x 1. 2. im about to say 3… 3 then some kind of punishment. did you ever explain to them why you were doing it? seems obvious now but hindsight am i right? anyways when you first begin to read it you maybe thinking, but im not a yeller, im not either BUT the principle is the same, and if you are a yeller, its fine bc this will help. this book taught me RESPECT for my kids as well. it made me realize that they do have their own wants and are to be growing independent. that a safe set of options will promote growth, and honestly peace.

im going to say that this HELPED a lot BUT hey theyre still kids so what else to we do? well my husband and i are firm believers in natural consequences. within reason we encourage the kids to be adventurous, and push the limits (maybe why we but heads with listening) but sometimes you can tell a kid so many times not to do something bc x will happen, but until they do it and it happens they do not see the cause and effect. while it is hard to see the kids struggle, this also opens the door for discussing consequences and our unending love. that even when they make a mistake they can and should come to us to find a solution. these small things like dont leave your buddies outside bc they will get rained on, they leave them out and get rained on, then they are sad… we give them a hug, and ask why theyre upset, well buddy got wet, we ask why did buddy get wet? bc i left him outside, we then ask, what did you learn, and what can you do different next time. they will usually give a good idea but we also offer other good alternatives, another hug and move on. this is setting the groundwork (i hope) for bigger issues. rebellion is something i anticipate, and i want our kids to know that no matter what they can come to us and we will love them and find a solution. what we do with our kids at a young age is building the foundation of our relationships with them.

outsiding my wildlings

we also believe kids BELONG outside. if youre a millennial like us, you probably grew up outside only coming home with the street lights come on. how much confidence did you build to figure things out on your own? probably a lot. now ill probably get some dirty looks here, and usually do at the parks as well. BUT i do not ‘play’ with my kids at the park, i keep an eye on them, and we talk from time to time, however they spend a majority of the time running around climbing talking to other people, falling, getting dirty, and more. too many times have i been given a dirty look bc my kid (heaven forbid) wants to play with their kid. they literally tell my kids that their kids cant play bc they might get hurt. this kind of interaction make me sad for a number of reasons, first of all their child has lot the ability to interact with children of their own age, but also deprived them of learning their own limits. We encourage our children to take risks( within reason ) to see what they can do. too often we do not give kids enough credit. If you are one of those helicopter mommas, i get it, its not really your fault you feel this way, maybe your child is the surviving rainbow child and your overcautious. maybe its because youre an only child and your parents full attention has always been soley on you, and you know no different. or maybe its bc you feel lost and unsure about what to do with YOURSELF at the park, i mean the imagination and joy of the park kinda lost its hold on me about 11 years old. you could be an introvert and dont know how to talk to the other moms. momma thats fine, where here for you! part of parenting is learning from others, in our current society, we are so isolated from one another that even interacting with other people is hard. This is a tough gig and i try so hard to understand WHY others parent the way they do bc maybe theyre onto something i can use. or maybe it shows me WHY i firmly believe the way i do. at the very least it teaches me compassion for what others are going thru.

letting go is hard, and i think with respect to helicopter moms, with the isolation of our society, its hard to know what is ok. as you might know were homeschooling our kids, we are wildschoolers, with a fluid curriculum. im only going to address the wildschooling part here bc it ties in with natural consequences, and a child natural inquisitiveness. kids are naturally curious, and very adept at getting messy, so we use that to our benefit. as much as possible we are outside, we make a full effort to go OUT and explore, learning about the world around us. this not only opens the door for a love of nature, but learning, and exploring. as far as safety goes, i joined some local hiking groups on fb, online hike it baby, and local nature preserve. this allows us to go out locally but also have the comfort of not being alone in the woods. maybe im overcautious, but one small women alone in the woods with 4 kids under 6 seems sketchy. the added bonus of going with groups is it give both the kids an i the opportunity to interact and learn from one another. the kids get to meet and explore and learn from other kids their ages, from kids of ALL different backgrounds, while allowing us moms the same. If youre a helicopter momma this would be a good way to give your kid some freedom while being present, and meet some new moms. like i said im sure you have valid reasons for parenting that way BUT consider trying to give your kid a little freedom

this leads us into trusting the kids. one of the biggest impacts of being more free range parents is that they get the rough and tumble, the messy the dirty, the loud, out of their systems and are better preparred to actually listen and obey. when they see that we do trust them to make good decisions and not micro manage their actions, the instruction we do give is much more likely to be followed.

yelling, crying, and tantrums

do you have a kid who yells, cries, throws and giant tantrum on the regular? yea so do i. i feel for you and want you to know you are absolutely not alone. this is something they have learned, it is a way to gain attention. im sure youve heard it before but im going to say it again, good or bad attention is attention. have you ever stepped back and noticed WHEN theyre going at it? is it at dinner time? witching hour, is a real thing, it when youre trying to get dinner around, your attention is less on the kids, theyre TIRED from the day, theyre HUNGRY. it all spells disaster and its normal, just take a deep breath chug a large glass of cold water and look them in the eyes, ask if theyre hungry? yes tell them youre making it, ask if theyre tired? yes, maybe, say why dont we sit down with a blanket and watch a movie why momma cooks, then if that doesnt work realize this is normal and your patience is likely at the end anyways so just IGNORE it. really its the only option. it teaches them it wont get them what they want any faster.

BUT if youre like me the other time theyre acting bat shit crazy, is when im on my phone. they cannot yet verbalize their need for your attention in a way that you understand. you maybe doing something completely valid on your device, grocery shopping, birthday party planning, calling the doctor, doesnt matter bc thats not what they see. they have NO idea what youre doing other than not giving them the attention they need. i read a story one time about a mom who put down her phone for the day and instead kept a tally of all the times her kids looked at her, it was truly depressing the amount of times they looked to her but what she would have missed on her phone, multiply that by everyday/night youre with them. we have become addicted to these things and havent even noticed in and are now trying to figure out how to get our kids to behave bc of OUR addiction. Its horrible, im guilty as well so trust me youre NOT alone. we have become so deprived of interaction with the outside world that we go on these devices to feel connected not noticing that its really taking us away from the people we care about the most! GUILTY and as with any addiction we need to address is realize it is a problem then set a course of action to address it. for me it is trying to ONLY use my phone when kids nap, go to bed. I can order groceries after bed, i can fb ONE time aday, etc… it will be hard and hey lets call this an accountability thing. it takes 21 days to form a habit so starting today put down the device and only check it 2 times once at noon, once at bedtime. print out a habit tracker and hang it on the fridge. trust me its hard i will do it with you, bc i am failing along with you in this regard. once you put down the phone and see all of the times your kids look to you, give them a smile, youre going to feel a little unsure about what you need to do. like lost, organize the pantry.

is this a post about getting kids to listen or about helping ourselves? well lets be honest its not ALL the kids fault they dont listen right? if we cant fix ourselves how do we intend to teach the kids something?

follow this list of things to do when youre feeling like looking at your phone and you will see how much the kids want to be involved WITH you, its a great opportunity to teach them some of the things they will need growing up, and to build good habits at a young age instead of struggling like us mommas now

  • clean the pantry
  • go thru the cup cabinet, toss all the ones that you truly dont need, be ruthless
  • deep clean the fridge, take it all apart and clean, toss old food
  • mop
  • dust (be honest when was the last time you fully dusted the house)
  • write a nice letter to your significant other, your mom, MIL, etc, and MAIL to them, teach the kids the art of writing and mailing, bc bills suck but a nice letter or card really can make someone elses day
  • clean the bathtub
  • wash the windows
  • go wipe down the cabinets, really they can get so gross
  • play playdoh with the kids
  • make a fort in the living room
  • watch a movie (sit in) on blankets with pillows and buddies, and actually watch it
  • read the kids a book, helpful hint find a book you can read several days, like little house on the prairie series, or check out ambleside online for your childs year, even if you do not homeschool these books are a great way to spend time with your kids
  • write, begin a story, have you kids illustrate, maybe a book of your days.
  • make cookies
  • make a cake just because
  • make cookies with cakemix
  • make a smoothy
  • find a recipe BOOK and have kids find one they want
  • learn a new handicraft, these are GREAT for putting down that phone, crochet, embroidery, knitting, while if your kids are not old enough i do encourage you to have a craft for them to do as well maybe playdoh, or clay
  • one of my favorite with the kids is art class, if youre not into messes, try to embrace it, im not talking glitter people, but rock painting, oil pastels are close to mess free( grab a magazine and have everyone color a page)
  • color in the coloring books with your kids.
  • fold the laundry
  • wash the bed sheets
  • fill a trash bag with things from the house you dont need.
  • the list is really endless but you get my point, we can accomplish so much more meaningful things in a day with our kids if we just break our own addiction

you will find that the more time off the device you spend being with your kids doing something, the calmer and better reactions YOU will have to them.

NO NO NO

basically my point here is that as much as we want our kids to obey us we need to take a step back and see that they are not solely responsible for it. we need to help them by helping ourselves. EVEN if you are NOT religious i highly encourage joining a local church. i know you may be strictly atheist, but hear me out. im not saying join a sunday service, find a wednesday night group meeting, these can be parenting classe, marriage classes, even bible study. find a place that has dinner before. make some friends, allow your kids to make some friends. these places are great for teaching kids obedience. and like i said even if youre not religious there is something to be learned from the bible stories and words written. you may thing its controlling but if you step back and see it just as a tool to morals, you will find somethings you can implement in your lives. my husband has been the biggest impact here for me, he was raised native american, and if you dont know anything about their belief system, know this its fluid, they take what works and what they like, and leave the rest. i was raised christian and never felt at home but once i met him and we talked about this i realized that there is so much i can learn from the bible. that i dont have to take it in a condemning tone. i have actually grown in my Christianity and faith bc of this way of looking at it. so dont poo poo me or this part in any case if youre so bad off it cant really hurt right and if it works well then mores the better.

we all are trying to do the absolute best for our kids and want them to be fully functioning compassionate strong adults, consider what it will take for them to reach that and instead of trying to ‘beat'(not physically only metaphorically) it out of them help them harness those attributes. I want my daughter to stand up for herself so why would i punish her for standing up to me? (within reason come on) im no expert but i do have kids and have tried so many things under the sun. if you have something you swear by that i didnt mention please comment and ill try to address in a following post. thanks for reading.

Posted in family, food, humor, Parenting, places

The incident at Cracker Barrel

the backstory

as you may or may not already know our family is on a homeschool journey. this was not a spur of the moment decision for us and we looked into many different curriculum options. Ultimately going with Classical Conversations for year . My oldest was kindergarten so it seemed like the right time to jump in. That said on the morning of the incident we were rushing around for Parent Practicum which was about 45 min from our house. it was day 2 of 3, and unlike the previous day, i did not have lunch packed and ready to go for break. After the kids and i got around we loaded into the truck and were on our way. the thought was that there were plenty of places around to go get lunch on break and be back for the afternoon session. Anywho morning session day 2 went off without a hitch and i decided we would have just enough time to get to Cracker Barrel, eat, and get back in time for the afternoon session.

So i pack up my 5 year old, 3 year old, and 17 month old into the truck and off we go. My youngest started right away to be fussy, which i figured was just because it was unbearably hot (or maybe it just was to my 6 month pregnant self) or because he was hungry… we arrive and head in. As soon as we walking i begin to think maybe this was a bad idea, but i push those suspicions to the pit of my stomach and press onward. We head to the hostess stand to be seated, this also happened to be located RIGHT beside the lightsaber toys and candy… of course 5yr old has to swoosh swoom voom the lightsaber about after his sister, and im all put it down! shes crying and im carrying a fussy baby, she says follow me, so we do, except when we get to the table my son isnt with us. I turn around and hes at some barrel table playing checkers, aww how cute the kind elderly couple says as they tell me to treasure these days. I smile politely and usher son to the table, strap in 17 mo old. I order right away as the server had been waiting while i corralled my children. the kids play the little skip game and fight over who gets what color crayons, and i am waiting for the food to arrive when dear son tells me he has to go to the bathroom, im like well the food will be awhile so lets go, i haul my preggo butt out of the seat, unstrap 17 mo from high chair and we all trudge back to the bathroom, right by the lightsaber display, which of course dear son has to pick up and swoosh swoom voom about completely forgetting he had to pee. Finally get him to put it down and walk into the bathroom, im thinking this is a great time to relieve my bladder as well, i stand 17 mo beside me in the stall as 3 and 5 enter their own stalls, everything seems to be going well, i hand 17 mo phone so i can unbutton my pants, he promptly throws it into the toilet, which i panic grab it out and think well should i wash it? bc you know germs, or not bc you know water and electronics equals disaster…i decide on wiping it down with papertowels and then damp soapy paper towels, kids are finishing up and im like well not worth going back in to pee, so i help them wash their hands, and we head back out to the table, of course we have to pass by the lightsaber display AGAIN, and of course my son has to swoosh swoom voom it about while i try to keep daughter and 17 month old on track to the table, i tightlippedly say to son PUT IT DOWN…. our food still hasnt arrived, i buckle baby boy into the high chair and negotiate with my older two about not fighting over the crayons, baby begins to fuss, im sweating, worried that were disrupting everyone around us. I make eye contact with a wonderful older lady at the table next to us,and apologize for the fussing she tells me im doing a great job, shes a grandma to 17 kids and a little fussing never hurt anyone so i shouldn’t apologize. I thank her for her kindness, then she brings me some crackers the server gave her for her soup for the baby. Im sooo thankful that hes entertained, the food finally arrives and the kids take maybe one bite, at which point my dear daughter tells me she has to poop. Im thinking were we not just in the bathroom? i ask her why she didnt go then, apparently five min ago she didnt have too.

I have two choices at this point i ask her to wait until we finish or we leave our food here to go. The thought of leaving food unattended in public was not appealing or safe so i asked her if she could wait until we finish eating. She says ya no pwoblem. so we continue eating, five min later she abruptly stands up and announces she has to go to the bathroom right now because it is starting to come out of her butt…. Oh my gosh, the grandma about looses it she has tears in her eyes. im mortified, but grab my purse unbuckle 17 mo old and grab 3 and 5 and head off back to the bathroom leaving most of our lunch untouched. i attempt to block 5 from the lightsabers to no avail while trying to make sure 3 doesnt go on the floor, finally shake the sabers from his grasp and we all wait for 3 to do her business. She finishes up and i help her was her hands AGAIN, im about to cut my losses and just go pay. I think it cant get any worse, WRONG, of course we have to go back by the light sabers and dear son of mine grabs it and swings it about, i finally manage to pry it from his greasy fingers and stomp over to the cash register.

I breath a sigh of relief bc the end is in sight, were next in line. BUT OHHH NOOOO of course khols cash lady is in front of me!, are you figgin kidding me? to top it off the cashier is a trainee who has to ask a supervisor EVERY dang question this lady is asking, AND THEN she begins to SHOUT across the shop to her friend about some scarf they had last week but she cant find it…. im loosing patience, and my kids are swinging around my ankles, round and around and around again. FINALLY it is our turn i hand him the receipt, turn around to my son to say DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING, then proceed with the small talk about how was the meal, did we find everything, CCCCRRRRAAAAAAAASH!!!!!!! oh my god, before i turn around i already know its my son, but not only that he has knocked over and entire clothing rack and sits among the heaps of clothing, the jewelry display scatters across the whole front of the store, im panicking, the manager comes out and is helping to clean up the mess, i drag son out of the mess, hes utterly embarrassed as am i.

the kind grandma from beside our table steps up and says youre doing a wonderful job mom, im like did you no just see what happened? tears fill my eyes, the cashier tells me the balance, i insert my card, DECLINED! what? what even is this day coming too??? oh its expired, NEAT, i hand him a different card and head on out dragging my children behind me…. i open the door to walk our and the sheer realization of how terribly bad this lunch hits me, i start cackling, dying laughing my son is truly terrified, if i had simply been cross with him he could have handled it better but the laughing sent him into hysterics, what a pretty picture we made… i skip the second part of practicum and head home, ive had enough of the day….

it was time to cut my losses and try again the next day.

as a mom of 3 soon to be 4 i realized that patience is really just a matter of thought. I dont think that i have any more or less then other moms just i really try to keep perspective on what matters. Yes i could have been mad, and let that ruin my day, but i laughed it off, and took the kids home for 2nd lunch, or as i like to call it the one they actually ate. Also since that day i decided that maybe eating out alone with my kids might just be too much for young kids. classical conversations like to call the parents lead learners not teachers… i definitely learned something that day.

Posted in babies, books, family, humor, Parenting, Uncategorized

My Obsession Part 3: confessions of a domestic failure

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Confessions of a Domestic Failure by Bunmi Laditan

This book was a quick entertaining read. It honestly felt in many aspects that this mom was me. She was a mess and honestly so am I. We pretend via social media to be perfect and put together but the honest and true reality is we’re all struggling. With the changes our body goes thru, the unfamiliar tasks of housekeeping, raising little people who have their own minds, marriage. This book dives into the funny truth we all try to hide. We don’t want to be judged in a negative light. If you’re feeling like you don’t have it all together read this book and know you’re not alone!

Posted in babies, family, humor, Parenting, Uncategorized

The incident at the Botanical Conservatory

THIS POST MAY CONTAIN AFFILIATE LINKS. I EARN A TINY COMMISSION AT NO EXTRA COST TO YOU AND I ONLY RECOMMEND PRODUCTS THAT ARE VALUABLE. IT KEEPS THIS BLOG GOING STRONG. CLICK HERE TO READ THE FULL DISCLOSURE.

Let’s talk about the botanical conservatory incident… I’m a mom who simply wanted a couple cute pictures of my children amongst the seasonal flowers. What I got was much more than anyone would conceivably ask for. It’s a normal day back in spring 2017. We had our third child and I thought 💭 hey let’s go to the conservatory and take a couple pictures. No problem. I decide to be brave and go on an outing with my three young children 4,2,3mo. Any fellow mothers of small children I’m sure you understand my initial hesitation. And after this my healthy respect for that gut check. Anywho we arrive, park in the parking garage, I pack up baby in the carrier and grab one hand of each of the other kiddos and we walk out and head to the conservatory. We check in no problem, walk to the first exhibit, right away find the perfect backdrop for that insta pic I can post to my social media right? I get the two older kids situated they’re working with me better than I could have hoped, so I take out the baby and put ever him so gingery into the arms of my 4 year old. Take about two steps back line up my shot and 4yr old: he peed on me. Me knowing it’s just a little baby spit up reassures 4 yr old. 4yr old: no he really peed on me mom. Me ok loosing some patience cause I just want one pic right? I go over to reassure 4yr. But to my abject horror find it’s not a little baby spit up, it’s also not pee, no it’s much much worse we’ve had an epic stage 10 blowout, red alert 🚨 panic sets in… I’ve got to find a changing table I scoop up baby as I run to the bathroom with 4 and 2 trailing me, little bits of the explosion falling onto my clothes, my hands are full of 💩. I push open the door lay him on the table, pull up my hair (cause yes it was just that bad)pull out my diaper bag to clean this whole mess up but find to my utter shock that I never packed the wipes I look around. I see it’s luckily a bathroom with paper towel dispensers, you know the kind you wave your hand in front of and eeeerrrrrrrmmmmm out pops a 4 inch long paper towel. I’m thinking ok I just need about ten right and things will be ok. Meanwhile 4 decides he needs to poop and loudly announces he needs help pulling his pants down bc there stuck 😫 ok unzip and un button(why do kids pants have these buttons with holes and zippers anyways? team elastic waist from now on) he gets down to business, meanwhile baby has been screaming bloody murder for the entire process, finally get baby stripped down to diaper and see the carnage that lays before me. my sunglasses slip off the back of my head, the lense pops out, but I can’t worry about that now. I must wave wait for paper towel eeerrrrmmmm wait for it to reset kachick and wave wait for paper towel eeerrrrrmmmmm wait for it to reset kachick let’s just say ten times do you know the amount of time that takes?! A literal eternity, I get them damp and decide to try wiping up some of the excess but before I can do that PLOP. ???? What was that? somehow 4 and 2 managed to grab the paper towel as it was coming out and yank yards upon yards out it’s over the stall door i have no idea how it got up there, it’s draped across the counter the sink the floor, it’s a giant glob of wet paper towel now plopped onto the changing table sopping wet. Baby is sobbing and thrasing about in a puddle of poop water I’m feeling true panic set in. the floors slippery, im sliding the kids are sliding baby is sliding. I bend over to get to work and my hair that I threw up, falls ever so gracefully from the messy bun and as if in slow motion brushes the poopy cheeks of my baby and splats onto my face. Somehow by the grace of god I get baby dried up, I get the soiled everything tossed in the trash I get myself in order, grab the germ wipes from behind the door, that were behind the door, and wipe down the whole room. Gather up my flock and head out to the exit, I’m crying and the check in lady asks if she can give me a raincheck ticket for another day, I thank her and we go home. It was an utterly shitty day 🙀 and I learned that short trips are no excuse for not double checking the diaper bag.

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